Wanted: one titanium spine…

…with robotic flexing power and a sturdy build.  Prefer a model that comes with cool synthetic muscles for my lower back.  Should allow me to go about daily activities without agonizing pain.  Multi-decade lifespan appreciated.  Bonus points if it comes in those cool rainbow colors like body jewelry.

My original spine will be flushed down the toilet.  I suspect the tiniest bit of pressure will snap it into pieces, allowing the vertebrae to enter the sewage system.  Failing that, I suppose that a spine sticking out of the toilet will be a great conversation starter.  But perhaps I should move into a two-bathroom place first.

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